Wednesday, October 28, 2015

Sparkly bits.

a) I don't know if you know this, but home design is ALL ABOUT MOROCCO right now.

For instance, I see this rug everywhere:

Also, poufs:

Also, the "Moroccan wedding blanket" as bedspread:


I am tempted, for reals.  But I think it might be better to actually go to Morocco & see what's doing, before festooning our house with it?

I'm adding Morocco to the travel list.  This list is loooooong.

b) The last of the halibut.
It's time to eat the last of the halibut I caught in Alaska this summer.  I'm thinking shallot butter sauce?

I highly recommend halibut fishing, if you find yourself in AK & specifically Homer.

But note: these fish are heavy & when you hook them, they do that thing where someone tries to lift you & you go all dead-weight on them.  Not cool.

However, you can have a deckhand help you reel in your limit (um, TWO) & then pay to have them filleted & shipped home & it is delicioso--not like Trader Joe's frozen/chewy, but like fresh.  I dunno how they do it, but having halibut steaks at the ready has been a complete pleasure.  I'm so glad I went.
Bye, halibut!  It was nice knowing devouring you.

Next week: Hellboy and me in the SD.

Monday, October 19, 2015

Close to home.

I have selected a toilet. 
If all goes well, it just might be the toilet I'll be using til I die, at approximately 103 years of age (thanks, Grandma!).

Maybe I'll die on it, like Elvis?
Probably not—cuz I'm chockfull of fiber.  But...something to think about.

Shelley is my point-person at the house before Hellboy and I move in.  We've had several fevered discussions about baseboard height, grout color, and pergola-lattice widths.

Usually my conclusion is "I don't really give a f*ck," though you can't say it quite that way to Shelley.
My favorite part comes later—the decorating part—when I turn our house into something resembling the Jungalow, with plants and textures and stimulation.
Hellboy, of course, has his interests as well.

He wants us to get a smoker:

We've been watching brisket-smoking tutorials on youtube, which are oddly riveting.

He's also been researching espresso machines, since Hellboy and I lurve our coffee.  He might set up Cafe Hellboy in the garage?

I am happy.

Next week: countdown.

Friday, September 11, 2015

A Hellboy of a boyfriend.

Meet my boyfriend, Hellboy:
Actually he looks more like Ron, pre-makeup:
But less exaggerated features...more like kindlyMidwestern-hotness.

Hellboy surprised me.  I wasn't looking for him.  I was looking for someone to hang out with, & we did.  But then he turned out to be like this:

  • Patient, while I figured out I was in love.
  • Smart--minus any braggadocio. 
  • Effortlessly, generously affectionate.
  • Quiet.  God, I love a quiet man. 
I like my girlfriends chatty; I like men to be quiet.  Not that Hellboy can't rant with the best of 'em, b/c he can.  But he is also an expert listener, and godknowsthatisrare.
  • He's a knee-weakening kisser.
  • Gets paint in his hair.
  • Takes me on surprise trips like to BAKERSFIELD where we eat tacos and visit Buck Owens' Museum and canoodle.

  • Makes up fabulous cocktails.
  • So unflappable I wanna flap him.  
  • Midwestern f*cking impeccable manners.  
  • Doesn't read music & can just play.  F*ck.
  • Sees my strengths as assets for us, not as a threat, or competition.
  • Loves smart women me.
  • Is not traditional, nor religious, nor spiritual.
  • Knows how to roast his own coffee.  [Sold.]
  • Buys me ice cream and puts his arm around me while I eat it daintily decimate it.
  • Works magic with a cast-iron skillet.
  • Loves his mom (though he calls her "Mahm" b/c accent).
  • Wears only one type—and one color—of socks.  
  • Benevolently gentle.
  • Unselfconsciously blunt.
  • Poignantly self-effacing.
  • Will work tirelessly as my photographic model, even in cemeteries. 
  • Is moving to San Diego with me:
We're going to live in Vivian's former home. We'll make lattes, and take walks together, and barbecue brisket, and start a garden, and sit under the pergola.

Life marches on.  And I'm as happy as Hellboy.

Next week: More happy.

Friday, August 28, 2015

Homer, Alaska; August 2015.

I'm back from Alaska.  And in general.

Next week: Prose.

Thursday, March 12, 2015


I've decided to take a little sabbatical from Burt. You can still find me at Hello and Good Buck, where I'll continue to post weekly or so:

Hello and Good Buck

Thank you for your emails--I've enjoyed reading them.

Saturday, March 7, 2015

72-degree quickie.

It's too beautiful outside to write much.  I accomplished nothing today except:

a) Making 2 pans of Martha Stewart's green enchiladas.
They are the most gringa enchiladas ever, but ay dios mio they're delicious.

b) Researching photo trips to Cuba.
I think I wanna go here in 2016.  Still thinking about it.

c) Making multiple reservations for my Oct NY trip.
Going to choose one later, depending on my mood.  That said, I think I'm ready to not share a bathroom anymore.

d) Buying a ticket to SD for Mother's Day.
Major Shelley-points.

Next week: Something riveting.

Friday, February 27, 2015

Let's go on an update!

So I have a new writing gig, & it's Super Fly.
But it's also on the peninsula.  OMG, THE SAN MATEO BRIDGE.  I love physically being on the bridge, but there are a lot of people trying to get physically onto the bridge to love it at the same time.  Hey Caltrans--think you could build a couple more bridges next to the bridge oh & add 4 lanes to the 880 Kthanks.

I just might have to get satellite radio again.  I love it when Howard imitates his family.
I love Howard so much that I've had dreams about housesitting for him.  Evidently, I really want Howard Stern to trust me.  Not sure what that means--but it's probably bad.

Also, Jillian is getting me Ripped in 30 again, at 5am.  Holy hell, it's cold & dark & painful at 5am.  I'm on Day tew.

Also, just bought a ticket to Bettye Lavette next week:

Can't f-ing wait.

Next week: Bettye!